is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
