We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize