I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
