Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
