Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm determined to sit on that face.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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