Texts From Last Night

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  (631): View more from New York

  It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.

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  (631): It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates. http://tfl.nu/ctme
  Replies (19) Good night (1410) Bad night (5272)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.

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  (301): you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens. http://tfl.nu/fm3u
  Replies (10) Good night (1021) Bad night (3325)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times

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  (775): My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times http://tfl.nu/d78u
  Replies (15) Good night (4254) Bad night (1072)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster

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  (908): Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster http://tfl.nu/yuhk
  Replies (4) Good night (566) Bad night (1449)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.

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  (970): I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious. http://tfl.nu/wv8w
  Replies (6) Good night (677) Bad night (1545)
• Favorite

  (845): View more from New York

  Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.

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  (845): Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions. http://tfl.nu/ahrr
  Replies (3) Good night (1147) Bad night (660)
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better

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  (715): I haven't seen her in ages, how is she? (651): Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better http://tfl.nu/q7yr
  Replies (5) Good night (2224) Bad night (683)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless

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  (914): Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless http://tfl.nu/meln
  Replies (5) Good night (1162) Bad night (492)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.

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  (847): I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year. http://tfl.nu/4k22
  Replies (2) Good night (990) Bad night (659)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.

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  (+44): I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home. http://tfl.nu/i339
  Replies (3) Good night (1316) Bad night (407)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.

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  (914): Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block. http://tfl.nu/om9a
  Replies (0) Good night (617) Bad night (398)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless

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  (570): U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless http://tfl.nu/wr07
  Replies (0) Good night (780) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together

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  (860): I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together http://tfl.nu/ghj0
  Replies (7) Good night (750) Bad night (424)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.

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  (914): I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer. (216): Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro. http://tfl.nu/w82v
  Replies (2) Good night (742) Bad night (618)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.

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  (832): SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US. http://tfl.nu/wq4q
  Replies (2) Good night (394) Bad night (141)

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