Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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