I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize