So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
