Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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