I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
