At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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