Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
Randomize
