Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Randomize
