I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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