just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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