In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
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Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
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I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
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