Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
