His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
