Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize