hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
