All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize