He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
His nipple licking is glorious
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