im drinking this country out of the recession.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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