why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
