She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
