so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
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hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
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That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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