capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
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I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
My life is pants optional.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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