it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
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So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
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Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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