I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
