brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I am in a vortex of obligation.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I just want nice things and good sex
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize