I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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