If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
