If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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