The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Barsexuality is the new black.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
