It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
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