I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
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