My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
