Girls should come with a carfax report
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Randomize
