BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Randomize
