oh god the rape fog is back!
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
