He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
