kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
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