just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
