its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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