Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
This house was built for laser tag.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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