Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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