I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
