you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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