if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
The struggles of a small town man whore
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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